The Banana Story
by Gone/JP Team

This is not really an article, it's more a kind of frustration I have and I bet you don't understand my feeling. But for some strange reason this subject comes to my mind every once a while and so I had to write about it.

It started in 1994 when I had to do civil service for the army. I was almost 18 years old and I was placed in a village called "Havelte". It was an one hour drive to Havelte and I met this guy who also got placed there and who was living next to me. On a certain day he suggested that we could drive together, so it was cheaper for the both of us. I agreed and the next day he would pick me up early in the morning. So he did, he drove into our street and all I could see where these silly things hanging in his car.

He had those fury funny creatures hanging on his inside mirror, on the windows, on the roof, he had them hanging everywhere. It was almost impossible to see him. You only could see these furry things. As I was sitting in his car for a while, I looked around in the car and noticed that most of those furry figures were bananas. Long bananas, short bananas, half way pealed bananas, it were all bananas. And I can not see the point of furry toy bananas hanging in a car. Look if it was an animal or something funny it would have been different, but what is the bloody point of hanging these things that look like a piece of fruit in your car.

So I asked him why he had all these things in his car and why it had to be bananas. Well, because I like bananas, he said. I replied by saying: You must eat bananas, not buy furry ones and hang them in the car. He just said once again, that he likes these things and he can do with them what he wants. So if I want to hang furry bananas in my car, I will do that.

Well, I said, it's your life and you must do what you want, but I don't understand the reason of hanging these banana lookalikes in your car. He seemingly got angry and answered that he did not liked this discussion. I answered that I will stop it then and wondered why he reacted this way.

For half an hour we drove on, until he didn't see a car coming from a street and he had to hit the brakes heavily. The tires were burning rubber and we almost hit the car that came from the right. When we finally stood still in front of the other car, I saw he was shaking from fear. And I made probable the worst joke I could ever think of. I asked: Didn't you see that car coming?He replied with a "No". I said: Probable there was a banana hanging in front of your eyes... He did not agree to my kind of humor and told me to get out of the car in a quite loud volume.

Clipart From JP#1o By Browallia/Nukleus There I stood, half way to the army, half way to home. The only thing I could do, was to find the nearest bus stop, or hitchhike. As I was walking the street, I put my thumb up and waited for a car to stop. Most cars drove on and there was no bus stop in sight. So I walked on and suddenly one car stopped for me and I asked if the driver could take me somewhere near the army base or to a bus stop. He answered he would take me to the base and I stepped inside the car. And you will probable not believe me, but when I got into the car and sat down I noticed that there was something hanging on his inside mirror. Yes, a fucking furry banana!

And until today, I often see cars that still have this strange phenomenon of the furry banana. And until today, I still do not understand why people have them hanging in their car. May god be with the banana drivers.